Everything Must Go!
by JigendaisukesHat
Summary: Dr. Wily, short on money, develops a new plan to fund his plots of global takeover.


Disclaimer: I do not own Arc the Lad, Mobile Suit Gundam, Lupin the Third, Comic Party, Metabots, Speed Racer, Mega Man, Fatal Fury, Sorcerer on the Rocks, Ranma ½, Pokemon, or Mega Man X.

**Everything Must GO!**

"Magnificent!" Dr. Wily proclaimed as the weekend sun gently shined on him. "Wily has discovered the means to acquire enough wealth to **crush** the world **once and for all**…" he scanned the yard to him skull shaped lair. "…**A YARD SALE!**"

There was a various amount of people scanning the items that lay on the tables on the lawn before him. He himself was sitting against the wall behind a desk with a box for the money he expected to make—which was a lot. On the nearest table a porcine-like man examined the small box that holds the cryogenically-frozen head of Ash Ketchum, who never did catch them all. On a nearby table multitudes of tools with a Colecovision among them, and on the table across from that one, a Dragon Ball and pots and pans. Those were the more common items considering he also had his inventions on sale as well as deadly weapons and an image inducer belt.

"Finally, Wily will only have to put up with these riffraff **one last day**!"

A gurgle came out from nearby him at his desk. "**Need…use…bathroom.**"

"Of course, it's just around the—" Wily noticed Mayor Galuana of Prodias in chimera form all disfigured and large. "—the…sorry. It's broken."

"Four bucks for a 'Zero Wing' cereal spoon?" Metabee questioned in outrage nearby.

From behind Daisuke Jigen opened his coat showing the glint of some silver candlesticks. "Don't be a sap," he said, "use the 'five finger discount'. There's a gravy boat under my fedora."

Meanwhile, back at the table, "These prices are **absurd**!" Misuki Takase declared. "I'm paying no more than two dollars for this bracelet!"

Wily looked at the golden 'bracelet' to which she held in her hands. "**Bracelet?**" He scoffed. "Miss, you hold in your small hands a legendary piece of the **God Armor**! With it's power you could—"

"But there's only **one** of them!"

"…fine. Two dollars." He sighed.

Coming back from that conversation Wily looked to Amuro who placed the Colecovision down on the table. "Ah, **excellent **purchase!" Wily deemed. "Only five dollars **and** it comes with 'Tank Wars'!"

"These prices suck, Wily!" Amuro whined, not like he did not do that normally, aside from in his novel. "I can get a Colecovision for a buck across the street!"

"Across the…?" Wily looked over to the home across the way where there was indeed another yard sale.

Speed Racer waved over to the dazed Wily, "Wassup?"

"Gah!" Anger burst forth from Wily. "That stupid racer thinks he can foil **Wily?** He—"

"Hello, Wily." Mega Man declared as he walked up to the doctor. "Lovely day for 'yard-sailing,' eh?"

"Wha--? **Mega Man!**" Wily cursed. "Don't you have anything **better** to do?"

"Business ain't doing so good, eh? Well that's the difference between you and me. I'm always **successful**!" Mega Man gloated. "I'm not only have foiled every one of your schemes, but I'm built a lot better than your cruddy robots!" Mega Man walked over to Fire Man who stood nearby.

"Huh? Wassup Mega Ma—" Fire Man was quickly knocked over by a simple tap.

Mega Man let out a laugh as Wily fumed. Roll walked up to the two. "Rock, **what **are you doing?"

Instead of chatting she merely walked over and began to walk away with Mega Man. "What did I tell you about teasing him? You know he's not right in the head."

Wily just stood there not knowing what to do.

"Excuse me…" Wily turned his attention to—Mega Man—X who happened to tap him on the shoulder. "You have **Zero**, my best friend and usual accomplice to my deeds frozen here in this block of ice, priced at twenty dollars." He explained as the two came upon the frozen block, of which X spoke of. "Since the odds are overwhelmingly in favor of him being **dead** by now, I can't possibly offer you more than ten!"

Wily just blinked. "Fine. Sold."

X brought back his elbow in a bend abruptly. "Yes! I still got it!"

Duo walked up to the block of frozen ice. Meanwhile within the block Zero was still concious and thought, _**Woo-hoo!** Iris here I come!_

Duo formed a fist. "**Zero**, trapped in **ice!** Let Duo assist you Mega Man." Duo let loose his power to aid in melting the ice. Unfortunately, the block was now in halves. Duo immediately went silent.

"…Crap. And I'm out ten bucks." X swore.

_Everything…getting…dark…_ Zero thought as his consciousness faded.

Back at his desk Wily focused on the next customer. "What do you want, sorcerer?"

Shibas Scotch, in all his rotten wretchiness, stood with a small stack of magazines in one arm. "I wanna buy these hilarious **Mad** magazines…uh…for…my servant, **Kiss**, of course!" He patted down his clothing. "Uh, it seems I left my wallet in my other pants. Listen, watch over my body while I go fetch them." Shibas used his **scotch chaser** technique to leave his body in order to get his wallet against protests from Wily.

Ginmei came up soon after though. "Hey, how much for the Shibas 'real doll'?"

Wily stared at him and then at the statue-like form of Shibas. "…how much do you have?"

After that short transaction it was not long until Wily was bothered again. "Hey!" Happosai, exclaimed wearing a simple belt with a device on the front. "How does this **image inducer** work? I wanna use it to fondle some women and steal their bras by posing as an old woman!"

"Pay first. Then Wily shall reveal."

"Anything!" The transaction complete, Wily displayed it's use, and Happosai did use it, and in a flash there sat a Metapod on the yard wearing the belt.

Wily looked down at it after a few moments. "No refunds." The Metapod slowly hopped off as Wily looked into his cash box. "Perfect! The coffers are full and all the junk is finally out of the rec room." Wily then noticed the return of Shibas Scotch in his scotch chaser form. "Excellent, this transaction is complete." Wily confirmed as he took the young man's money.

"Cool…say…what do you think is better? Mad or Cracked?"

"The sale is over. Please leave immediately." Wily simply said.

"Fine." Shibas replied. "I'll just…where's my body? I left it right—**urk**!" Pain went through his body. "Something…**Ow**…is wrong."

Miles away, Genmei sat with the sorcerer's body, having made use of his purchase once. "Finally my dreams have come true."


End file.
